Posts tagged ‘4th of July’

July 6, 2010

Dignified Drinking or “How I Shotgunned a Miller Highlife Camo Tallboy at my 4th of July Party”

Planning the perfect summer holiday party takes a lot of thought and consideration to balance the traditional patriotic food – always dead animals on the grill – and festive beverages. This year we had a few neighbors over and served the most American beverage we could think of: beer. Not just any beer, but ‘Merican beer from a variety of producers. We had a selection of microbrews from both Texas and Oregon on hand. Some delicious stuff, but I’m not going to give you my tasting notes on any of them.

Nope. I’m here to share the best part of the afternoon. Shotgunning a Miller Highlife tallboy in a camoflauge styled can. Now that’s class.

I have no idea the origins of this binge drinking method. I assume it was invented by some frat boy. I do know the purpose. Instant buzz. Do you remember the first time you did it? Was it in high school or college? I remember trying to teach a friend, Robbie, in high school how to do it in the mall parking lot right after work. Robbie spilled the better part of three beers down his shirt before we were interupted by the local law enforcement. We quickly tried to kick the empties under my car, but that was no use as the cop car spotlight illuminated everything going on. It turns out the cop was the dad of a kid that we played soccer against at a rival high school. We started talking about the game and his son, and he let us off without so much as a ticket. Luck.

When’s the last time you shotgunned a beer? I’m can do it pretty quickly, but was never the fastest. My friend LFBIII always beat me in high school and college. How fast can you do it? Looking at the counter on this video, I sucked down 16ozs of golden bliss in 8 seconds. Can you top that? Post your best time here and let me know what you are drinking.